The authors of this paper suggest that the large scale production of Higgs particles may exert an influence from the future to the past which will prevent the large scale production of Higgs particles. They propose an experiment which consists of drawing a card from a deck of cards that have been weighted according to the cost of the action that is written on the card. One such action will be to shut down the LHC. As it is hypothesized that the large scale production of Higgs particles may not be possible – that it will be prevented by the influence of the Higgs from the future – the probability of drawing the shut down card will be amplified. This experiment will tell us if we should shut down the LHC now to save some money, rather than waste a whole bunch of cash and then be thwarted by the Higgs influence sometime later.
The experts in room 408 have a different theory. It is possible that the large scale production of Higgs bosons in the future may influence the present in such a way as to make people more likely to comment on this post. We believe that this effect follows naturally from the fact that the Higgs is a scalar particle. To test this theory, we suggest the following experiment for readers to test out: Take a set of playing cards and allocate some number of them to represent “post on blog” and the rest of them to represent “don’t post on blog”. The ratio of post cards to no-post cards should be chosen to reflect the actual probability of you posting a comment on the blog. You should then draw random card and perform the corresponding action. To amplify the causality violating effects of the future Higgs bosons, we recommend having lots of “post on the blog” cards.
August 24, 2007 at 1:31 am |
Personally I decide to post or not post depending on the I Ching, which seems like the most reasonable thing to do. Sometimes, however, the Germans and Japan have won the WWII.
August 27, 2007 at 9:45 am |
By the lack of comments on this post I think we can safely say that there is no future influence going on. Furthermore, since our theory is sound, we can conclude that the Higgs boson will not be found at the LHC.
Remember, you heard it here first.
August 27, 2007 at 11:21 am |
I was too lazy to find a deck of cards. I took that as a sign I should post.